Despite What People Say, Your Reputation Is Just As Important As Your Character

Hey guys!

As I was surfing the internet as always for inspiration, I stumbled on this piece that will blow your minds out. At first when I was reading through, it was as if everything was all about me. Am sure reading through also can relate to you too.

Conventional wisdom tells us that your character should matter more than your reputation. After all, one is who you really are, while the other is just what other people perceive you to be.

While there’s certainly virtue in knowing that no misperception of you can really impact the truth of who you are, it is a false notion to think that we don’t have to care what other people think about us.

However, we hear the opposite as a rally-cry all the time.

It doesn’t matter what other people think!

Except it does, because everything you want in life involves other people.

Now, small-minded people who are intent on disliking you for their own prejudiced reasons are not what we’re talking about. No, we’re not even talking about the people who dislike you for legitimate reasons.

Your reputation does matter as much as your character because the way people perceive you is who they imagine you to be, and who they imagine you to be determines how they will interact with you, what they offer you, whether or not they want to work with you, and whether or not they show up for you.

You cannot behave like a social pariah and then just fall back on the idea that it “doesn’t matter what other people think” because you’re a good person at heart.

All that goodness will be for nothing if you aren’t actively considering the opinions of others. No, not so they can weigh you down and stop you from pursuing your goals, but because when other people have a consensus about you, you’re typically the common denominator.

It matters what the people in your close circle think.

It matters what your partner thinks.

It matters what the people you love think.

If everyone in your life thinks you’re making a mistake, you might really need to take a moment to consider whether or not you might be. If everyone in your life is warning you about your new partner, you might need to take a moment to consider if perhaps they have a point. If everyone in your life seems to have the same problems with you, for the same reasons, in the same patterns, at the same frequencies, you might really need to take a moment and determine whether or not the world is just crazy and out to get you or if, perhaps, there’s also a pattern in your behaviour.

It’s easy to not care what other people think.

It’s convenient, actually.

It totally lets us off the hook, it allows us to validate our own motives and desires without any real consideration for those around us.

The work is not that we completely neglect our own needs and opinions in favour of other people’s.

The work is that we both advocate for and tend to our own needs, honour our own opinions, and still remain cognizant of how people are responding to us.

If you want to get anywhere in life, you have to be a reasonably likable person, or at the bare minimum, not impossible to work with, difficult to connect with, or challenging to love.

And to do that, we have to think about what other people are thinking. Not so their opinions of us can become our own, but so that their opinions of us can inform our own.

In all, I appreciate one of my mentors and excellent writer Brianna Weist for always coming through whenever I need a push in my life. Her piece of work is very deep and encouraging. Also it’s a privilege to always acknowledge your work on my page.

The First Step To Self-Care Is Actually Giving A Shit About Yourself

Hey guys!I was amazed when I set my eyes on this write up. I have no other choice but to share it with you. It is a guest post from one of my role model and beautiful writer Holly Riordan 🙌🔥Please be patient when reading.

The first step to self-care is deciding you matter. You deserve to feel confident. You deserve to feel loved. You deserve to feel whole.

You have to stop telling yourself that it doesn’t matter what you do with your time because no one cares anyway. At the very least, you have to care. After all, you’re the only one who matters.

If other people aren’t paying attention to you, aren’t supporting you, aren’t loving you, that’s outside of your control. The only thing you can control is our own actions, your own thoughts, your own choices.

The first step to self-care is actually giving a shit. It’s deciding that you care about where your career is headed. You care about whether your friendships are stable. You care about what happens to your heart. You care about whether you get enough exercise that day, whether you eat enough that day, whether you take care of your hygiene that day. You care about yourself.

If you don’t care about yourself, if you continue to believe that you are worthless and aren’t going to make it so there’s no point in even trying, then you’re going to get caught in a self-destructive cycle. You’re never going to take a chance on yourself. You’re going to keep coming up with excuses to stay hidden inside your comfort zone. You’re never going to change.

It’s a pretty simple concept. If you don’t care about yourself, you’re not going to take good care of yourself. You’re going to stop trying. You’re going to let yourself waste away. And you cannot let that happen. You cannot forget your worth. You cannot treat yourself so unkindly.

Maybe you’re unable to love yourself right now because you’re distracted by your flaws. Or maybe you made a mistake you consider unforgivable and can’t stop thinking about the past. Or maybe you’re just in a toxic mindset right now.

If learning to love yourself sounds like too big of a leap from where you are right now, you can start by learning to give a shit about yourself.

You don’t have to love your body yet, but you should give a shit about keeping it clean and healthy. You don’t have to love your job yet, but you should give a shit about whether you’re doing the right thing at work. You don’t have to love your life yet, but you should give a shit about continuing it, strengthening it, bettering it.

It’s not going to be easy to change the way you think. It’s not going to be easy to suddenly start giving a shit about yourself after years of not caring at all — but it might be a little bit easier than suddenly loving yourself unconditionally.

Give a shit about whether you make healthy decisions that day.

Give a shit about whether you compliment yourself that day.

This is a guest post.

The Truth About Transforming Your Life Is That It Is Often Means Doing Less, Not More

The beginning of a self-transformation requires action, but the end of it requires something deeper, something harder, something you’ve probably never realized before.

While doing more will almost always generate results, there’s an untapped, life-changing magic in doing less.

Sometimes, your problems don’t come from what you’re not doing, they come from what you can’t stop doing.

To really change your life, you probably need to consume less. You probably need to learn to use what you have, to take a breath and stop yourself every time you think you need that one new perfect thing that will magically transform you into a new person.

You probably need to spend less. You probably need to reevaluate your patterns and behaviors and refocus on your long-term goals, prioritizing your future comfort over your immediate gratification.

You probably need to engage less, both with people who are not mentally mature and people whom do not have any intention of having a civil discourse with you. This is not because you can’t speak freely, but because having an exchange with someone whose intent is to fight you rather than connect with you will always be a losing situation.

You probably need to change less. When we start out on our healing journey, it’s about uprooting, replanting, and sprouting. But if you’re unhealed beneath the surface, you won’t be able to lay roots without wanting to rip them out again. Healing, you will find, is not about how many times you can start over, it is whether to not you can bloom.

You probably need to care less. When your mind is consumed with trying to master and perfect every single little thing in your life, you get overwhelmed and give up. Instead, you have to focus on the few things that are actually requiring your attention, and then build from there.

You probably need to do less. Not because you shouldn’t be productive, but because you only have so much energy in a day, and when you spend it on things you don’t really care much about, you find yourself constantly exhausted, drained and at your wit’s end.

You probably need to have fewer expectations. Often, we conflate that with having high standards, but they aren’t the same thing. Unrealistic expectations will slowly wreck you, because they require that you achieve perfection immediately. When your expectation is that you should be a natural-born master of whatever you try to do, it becomes really hard to show up and do the work consistently, which is what you actually have to do to achieve mastery.

You probably need to not try so hard. When you try to force people to like you, it usually has the opposite effect. When you try to convince yourself you’re attractive, you usually seem less so. When you are trying to force every outcome in your life, there’s usually a reason they aren’t coming together on their own.

You probably need to give fewer excuses. Not because you’re going to be unkind to yourself, but because the kindest thing you can possibly do is stop avoiding the honest truth about what’s wrong. You cannot keep trying to positive-self-talk your way into thinking you love your life when you do not. When we’re ready to make fewer justifications, it means we’re also ready to make greater change.

The truth about doing less is that it’s going to bring you into stillness. It is going to require you to face that discomfort you’ve been running from head-on.

The truth is that when we first realize we need to change our lives, it is easy to get swept away in the escape fantasy of it all. Everything has to go, and nothing can stay. There’s an addictive quality to starting over, and if you’re not careful, you can confuse it for actually healing.

Truly getting better is learning to be okay where you are, wherever you are. It is actually metabolizing that discomfort for once, listening to it, letting it show you where you are deeply misaligned.

It is to become grounded, to make positive decisions for the long-term, to start breaking those destructive habits that have been fueled by the pain you haven’t quite had a name for all these years.

It is to no longer be controlled by your feelings, but by your ambitions, by your dreams for the future.

When you go about changing your life, sometimes, the most radical shift of all is to do absolutely nothing — and wait for the sun to rise.

This is a guest post from Brianna Weist.

Single’ Is A Status, Not An Identity

Hey guys!

Normally I don’t post on relationships but a friend of mine triggered this that made me to share this piece. Being single is not an identity nor being married. It is a status that will eventually change in the course of time.

You are single. And whether that’s because a previous relationship didn’t work out, someone left, you messed up, you haven’t found your person yet, or you’ve never been in anything serious—this is the simple truth about you—you are (gloriously) on your own.

But this is nothing to feel shame about.

Being single is something to celebrate. Because the word does not define you. Because you are in a place where your thoughts, decisions, actions, and choices directly influence and benefit you. Because you are able to pursue whatever makes you happy, excited, passionate, or wild without anything or anyone holding you back. Because you have time, and there’s no need to rush. Because finding someone to love isn’t, and shouldn’t ever be the central focus of your life.

Because when someone looks you in the eye, they don’t see your relationship status as a label of who you are. Because ‘single’ is a description—not an identity.

Sometimes it feels like the world around you is caught up in connections. You look on social media and you’re flooded with images of happy couples, of marriages, of weddings, of beautiful families with babies. You open your mailbox and there’s another invite to so-and-so’s shower. You walk down the street and watch couple after couple canoodle, hand-in-hand.

Sometimes you can’t help but wonder if there’s something wrong with you, if you’re the one who’s messing up every relationship you fall into, if you’re ever going to find real love.

We’ve all been there. We’ve all wondered, doubted, frowned at our reflection in the mirror. We’ve all questioned whether or not we’re the one to blame, worked on ourselves, got back out there, failed and tried and failed and tried again.

The thing is, sometimes we get so wrapped up in where we stand that we forget who and how worthy we are. We’re so focused on what our relationship status is that we forget the importance of just being, and just being who we are—an entity, all on our own.

We worry whether we’re ‘enough,’ whether we’re ‘too much,’ whether we’re on the right path. We worry about when on the timeline of our lives we’ll fall into our special someone, or if they even exist. We worry about how we look to the rest of the world, if we’re making the right decisions, if we’ve already found our person and just don’t recognize him or her.

But all that worrying does nothing but push us away from the positivity that surrounds us. If we’re so consumed with falling short, we’ll never believe we’re worthy of the love that might naturally fall into our laps. If we’re so focused on all the past relationships that have failed, we won’t appreciate a good one. If we can’t let go of our pain, we won’t make room for new people, new experiences, new chances.

The truth is, none of us have this ‘love’ thing figured out. We’re all navigating, all searching, all trying to find someone whose mess mixes with ours and love them, choose them, fight with and for them as we grow. We’re all failing around, trying to learn who we are and can be alongside someone else.

But the most important thing we must remember is that being ‘single,’ is not an identity.

Sure, you can celebrate your singleness. Sure, you can focus on yourself and keep your distance from connections if you’re simply not ready. Sure, you can be a healthy version of selfish. Sure, you can prioritize your own happiness before engaging with someone else.

But don’t allow your relationship status to define who you are and will become.

You are worth far more than a label that limits you. And who you are as a person is not defined by whether or not you’re loved, or loving someone.

As you live your life, as you work, as you chase dreams and desires as you let go of your past and begin again, as you learn to trust, as you smile and laugh and pursue what feels right—don’t forget this simple fact: Your singleness is a status, a moment in time, a description, not a definition.

You Can’t Please Everyone: Live Your Life

I used to be stubborn to change. Back then, if it’s “not like me” to do something, then I just wouldn’t do it. However this mindset held me back from growing and evolving like we should be.


People will say shit like “you’ve changed,” but isn’t that something we should all be doing (for the better)? Obviously the 21 year old you will have to approach life differently than the 12 year old you did.

I feel like if you want change to happen in your life, you’re going to HAVE to do something out of your comfort zone — or something that will eventually break you out of your normal routine and tendencies. Eventually your new habits and perspective will make you seem like a different person, but I just like to view it as someone who grew and learned. Some moments in life may require you to be that 12 year old you. Other moments will need you to be the 21 year old you. Either way, you can’t expect to please everyone with your personality. You’re the one living your life, not them, so ya do what ya need to do to succeed.

The Unspoken Words of Connection

This is a guest post from Titi Adenuga


It’s in the locking of eyes and letting it stay.

It’s in the curving of lips and letting out a smile.

It’s in the nod of heads in agreement or the wave of hands.

It’s in true and genuine admiration of someone or something.

It’s in the first steps, just like we learnt to walk – ‘hi’ ‘hello’

It’s in the affirmation and the reaching out. Most times, as always, someone must take the initiative.

It’s in the ease and flow – there’s sometimes usually no walls here.

It’s in the remembering of names and recalling it a few minutes or seconds after.

It’s in the hugs and kisses and holding of hands.

It’s even in the words we speak and how we say them.

It’s in letting in – sometimes a little deeper than casual.

It’s in the little things and sometimes in the big ones but most importantly, in how we make others feel –even if you just met them or long after they are gone.

It’s in the impressions – that’s not just a social media buzz word; it’s a human code.

It’s in embracing who we are and what makes us uniquely human.
Love & Light,

Footnotes:
A lot of my thoughts and writings recently have been around human connection. I find it interesting and feel it’s very important for people to learn the art of connection. It is in the simplest things, yet they seem difficult because we love to protect our egos and would rather stick our faces in the light of our phones, scrolling and most times, doing absolutely nothing! Even by doing that, I have learnt that we simply just want to connect. I am not exactly extroverted but I truly enjoy the deep and sweet feeling of connecting with people. We all need our communities (physical and virtual) safer and kinder and to have this ideal community, we must all put in an effort to make it happen – HAVE YOU SMILED AT SOMEONE TODAY?

The Strength In Our Scars

Trace the scars life has left you in. It will remind you that at one point in life, you fought for something you believed in.


You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Mark Twain’s Top 9 Tips for Living a Kick-Ass Life

Originally posted on THE POSITIVITY BLOG.

“It’s no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.”

“Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.”

“When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it’s a sure sign you’re getting old.”

You may know Mark Twain for some of his very popular books like Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and The Adventures of Tom Sawyer.

He was a writer and also a humorist, satirist and lecturer.

Twain is known for his many – and often funny – quotes. Here are a few of my favorite tips from him.

1. Approve of yourself.

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

If you don’t approve of yourself, of your behavior and actions then you’ll probably walk around most of the day with a sort of uncomfortable feeling.

If you, on the other hand, approve of yourself then you tend to become relaxed and gain inner freedom to do more of what you really want.

This can, in a related way, be a big obstacle in personal growth.

You may have all the right tools to grow in some way but you feel an inner resistance. You can’t get there.

What you may be bumping into there are success barriers. You are putting up barriers in your own mind of what you may or may not deserve. Or barriers that tell you what you are capable of.

They might tell you that you aren’t really that kind of person that could this thing that you’re attempting.

Or if you make some headway in the direction you want to go you may start to sabotage for yourself. To keep yourself in a place that is familiar for you.

So you need give yourself approval and allow yourself to be who you want to be. Not look for the approval from others. But from yourself.

To dissolve that inner barrier or let go of that self-sabotaging tendency. This is no easy task and it can take time.

2. Your limitations may just be in your mind.

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

So many limitations are mostly in our minds. We may for instance think that people will disapprove because we are too tall, too old or balding.

But these things mostly matter when you think they matter. Because you become self-conscious and worried about what people may think.

And people pick up on that and may react in negative ways.

Or you may interpret anything they do as a negative reaction because you are so fearful of a bad reaction and so focused inward on yourself.

If you, on the other hand, don’t mind then people tend to not mind that much either. And if you don’t mind then you won’t let that part of yourself become a self-imposed roadblock in your life.

It is, for instance, seldom too late to do what you want to do.

3. Lighten up and have some fun.

“Humor is mankind’s greatest blessing.”

“Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.”

Humor and laughter are amazing tools. They can turn any serious situation into something to laugh about. They can lighten the mood just about anywhere.

And a lighter mood is often a better space to work in because now your body and mind isn’t filled to the brim with negative emotions.

When you are more lighthearted and relaxed then the solution to a situation is often easier to both come up with and implement.

4. Let go of anger.

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”

Anger is most of the time pretty pointless. It can cause situations to get out of hand. And from a selfish perspective it often more hurtful for the one being angry then the person s/he’s angry at.

So even if you feel angry at someone for days recognize that you are mostly just hurting yourself. The other person may not even be aware that you are angry at him or her.

So either talking to the person and resolving the conflict or letting go of anger as quickly as possible are pretty good tips to make your life more pleasurable.

5. Release yourself from entitlement.

“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

When you are young your mom and dad may give a lot of things. As you grow older you may have a sort of entitlement. You may feel like the world should just give you what you want or that it owes you something.

This belief can cause a lot of anger and frustration in your life. Because the world may not give you what expect it to.

On the other hand, this can be liberating too. You realize that it is up to you to shape your own life and for you to work towards what you want. You are not a kid anymore, waiting for your parents or the world to give you something.

You are in the driver’s seat now. And you can go pretty much wherever you want.

6. If you’re taking a different path, prepare for reactions.

“A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.”

I think this has quite a bit of relevance to self-improvement (and also to starting a business online now that I think about it).

If you start to change or do something different than you usually do then people may react in different ways.

Some may be happy for you. Some may be indifferent. Some may be puzzled or react in negative and discouraging ways.

Much of these reactions are probably not so much about you but about the person who said it and his/her life. How they feel about themselves is coming through in the words they use and judgement they make.

And that’s OK. I think it’s pretty likely that they won’t react as negatively as you may imagine. Or they will probably at least go back to focusing on their own challenges pretty soon.

So what other people may say and think and letting that hold you back is probably just fantasy and barrier you build in your mind.

You may find that when you finally cross that inner threshold you created then people around you may not shun you or go chasing after you with pitchforks. 🙂 They might just go: “OK”.

7. Keep your focus steadily on what you want.

“Drag your thoughts away from your troubles… by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.”

What you focus your mind on greatly determines how things play out. You can focus on your problems and dwell in suffering and a victim mentality.

Or you can focus on the positive in situation, what you can learn from that situation or just focus your mind on something entirely else.

It may be “normal”� to dwell on problems and swim around in a sea of negativity. But that is a choice. And a thought habit.

You may reflexively start to dwell on problems instead of refocusing your mind on something more useful. But you can also start to build a habit of learning to gain more and more control of where you put your focus.

8. Don’t focus so much on making yourself feel good.

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

This may be a bit of a counter-intuitive tip. But as I wrote yesterday, one of the best ways to feel good about yourself is to make someone else feel good or to help them in some way.

This is a great way to look at things to create an upward spiral of positivity and exchange of value between people.

You help someone and both of you feel good.

The person you helped feels inclined to give you a hand later on since people tend to want to reciprocate. And so the both of you are feeling good and helping each other.

Those positive feelings are contagious to other people and so you may end up making them feel good too. And the help you received from your friend may inspire you to go and help another friend.

And so the upward spiral grows and continues.

9. Do what you want to do.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did so. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Awesome quote. And I really don’t have much to add to that one.

Well, maybe to write it down and keep it as a daily reminder – on your fridge or bathroom door – of what you can actually do with your life.

My take- Mark Twain has always been my favourite motivator. From his quotes to teachings about life.

Share and comment.

What We Can Learn As Christians From The Series: God Friended Me

The first time I saw the trailer on google, I was convinced that this series will play a major impact in my life and in many Christians.

God friended me is an American comedy- drama that centres in the life of an atheist who got a friend suggestion on facebook named God. This account suggests new friends suggestion to “miles” who plays the major character, in helping and assisting people.

As an atheist who doesn’t believe in God, yet he does God’s work, so far the aim is to help people in need.

Here are some tips we can learn from this wonderful series as Christians.

  • God can use anyone to do His work. No matter who you are or what your beliefs are, God uses anybody. Remember Jesus dined with sinners and mover with sinners.
  • God knows us more than ourselves. No matter what the flesh does, God sees us more through our hearts and inner mind.
  • Being a christian and born again doesn’t make you perfect. As God uses the weak ans non believers to do His works, it’s a sign that God is not partiality.
  • Finally, God loves each and everyone of us.

I encourage you to start watching this series if you have not started watching. There are a lot of lessons to be learnt.

NB: feel free to comment your contributions and suggestions.

Imagine credit: Pinterest

Living The Life Of An Overcomer [Your Calling as a Christian]

In today’s world we’re told to focus on overcoming external problems. But as a Christian, living the life of an overcomer is an internal focus.

For a long time, I believed that living the life of an overcomer had to do with conquering circumstances, winning an external battle. I thought that living a life of an overcomer meant making things happen despite many challenges. Perhaps this is part of it, but there is more. I’ve come to realize that our internal battles are greater predictors of the outcome and quality of our day to day lives than our circumstances.

I have come to realize that the Lord was calling us to overcome the greater battles of what lie within us.

God is calling us to overcome our thinking and heart meditations; ideas about religion that draw us away from the truth by distracting us with rituals and acts. Early in the New Testament, Jesus quickly points to the importance of concerning ourselves with the condition of our hearts rather than external factors. In our time the focus on what we eat seems trivial, but at that time in history “purity” also had to do with what one ate.

What goes into someone’s mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them. But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these things defile a man. – Matthew 15:11, 18

How radical was this?

Jesus said this at time when religious people were concerned with doing what appeared to be right. Back then people were so focused on following procedures. This applies to us today as well. We live in a social media world, our bible lets us know that it’s not about being seen by people, but being known by God. That is the power of the truth; it’s time-less.

The heart can’t be seen, but only God knows what is in it.

We are told to focus on overcoming that which can’t be seen. The thoughts and intentions of the heart. It’s that bitterness, judgment, anger, hatred, unbelief, negativity, greed, jealousy, immorality, anxiety, chronic frustration, …The list can go on and on. When we don’t focus on these things that are contrary to the Spirit of God, they begin taking root within us and begin to feel like they are part of who we are. These are the things we have housed for so long that they feel like part of our DNA. This may be normal in today’s world, but it’s not our portion.

We are called to live the life of an overcomer. It’s a calling that only radical Christians can live.

We have to reject what the world says is okay and good for us. We have to refuse to be normal. Even though no one can see it and applaud our efforts, we have to engage in an inner battle to be right with the Lord.

You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God. – James 4:4

Everyday we have to overcome our inner self. We can’t do it on our own. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. We have to keep calling upon Him who made us conquerors. Confessing our shortcomings and repenting. The Kingdom of heaven is near. We don’t want to be turned away at the gate while we recite the acts we did in the name of Jesus. The outcome of such a choice was made plain to us.

The Word tells us, many are called but few are chosen. Christ must be Lord of our hearts, sitting on the throne of our hearts. It was revealed to those who choose to believe when Jesus was asked by the disciples which commandment was the greatest. They wanted to know, if we fail to do it all, what must be definitely get right.

This is the anchor for living the life of an overcomer:

“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” – Matthew 22:37-40

May God help each of us to have a pure heart; so we can begin living the life of an overcomer.

An inspirational piece from Priscilla Shumba.

The Question is: Are you living the life of an overcomer?

Why Your Dreams Require Band-Aids

This is a true life inspirational experience and story.

Fulfilling a dream is a lot like surfing. We fall a lot. But when we honor God with our dreams, He remains with us through the highs and lows.

You have a dream, right? So do I. We probably have more than one, maybe even dozens. If your dream isn’t brand new and you’ve started taking steps to pursue it, you’ve likely discovered that the path to fulfillment is something like the field of poppies that Dorothy had to cross to reach the Emerald City in The Wizard of Oz.

Those poppies sure look pretty, but [spoiler], the wicked witch has poisoned them to keep Dorothy from reaching her goal. Hopefully none of us are picking our way through a field of poison poppies today, but if you’re like me, you might be buying some Band-Aids.

Case in point

My husband James and I both love the outdoors, but the primary difference between us is that he was born with natural ability and I have to work for every ounce of strength and skill I have. One sport he introduced me to is surfing, and last year, I shared my preliminary experience with you. Since then, I’ve improved … a little.

Understand that my goal with this sport is not lofty. I don’t want to metal in a sporting event or even qualify to participate in one. I simply want to get upright long enough to enjoy the wave and then get off without injuring myself.

The size of our goal doesn’t matter as much as how willing we are to stick with it. In that regard, surfing and dreams in general have a few common qualities.

To succeed, you will fall.

Falling off a surfboard provides a physical sensation that equates well to the pain of failure. You don’t just fall off a surfboard and land gently in the water. Your board might nose dive, catapulting you over it. You might get sucked under the water and feel like you’re drowning.

However, the more you fall, the wiser you become. As you practice, you will keep falling, but experience will teach you that even when you feel like you’re going to drown, you should wait a few moments before surfacing, or your board might land on your head. Yes, ouch.

Pursuing dreams is similar. You might get rejected, turned down, booed, told “that’s impossible,” or any number of scenarios. If you don’t quit the first time, the second time, or the hundredth time you fall, you will eventually meet success or at least approach your goal more intelligently.

To succeed, you will scrape your knee.

Be prepared. Pride and self-interests often take a back seat when pursuing goals.

The last time we walked to the beach with surf boards in tow, I had one wish: Please, please let me not get hurt today. You see, last year, I took a hefty chunk of skin off my left knee that required a bigger Band-Aid than even the lifeguard could provide.

For the first hour, I was getting the hang of things. I welcomed smaller waves and kept getting up on the board for some decent rides. The only problem was that since my waves weren’t deep, I was riding them into much more shallow waters. All it took was one wrong fall, and I scraped the skin off my other knee.

So now they match. Kind of. I jokingly tell James that thanks to this sport, I will have prematurely ugly knees.

The bigger the dream, the bigger the fight

Yes, our dreams sometimes leave us feeling scraped up.  As Pete Wilson shares in his book What Keeps You Up at Night, “The bigger the dream, the bigger the fight you’ll face. In fact, the people throughout history who have been the most directly in the center of God’s will for their lives are the same people who have gone through the toughest trials.”

Wilson gives the example of Joseph, one of my favorite Bible characters. Talk about someone whose dream presented obstacles! He went from daddy’s favorite to a slave and a prisoner before God elevated him to Pharaoh’s right hand man. His life experience left more than scraped knees. But through all the setbacks and disappointments in his life, Joseph sought to honor God through his circumstances, and God remained with him.

Several times in Scripture, we find this idea of God being present with Joseph through every low point in his life (emphasis added below).

  • The Lord was with Joseph, and he was a successful man; and he was in the house of his master the Egyptian.” (Genesis 39:2 NKJV)
  • “But the Lord was with Joseph and showed him mercy, and He gave him favor in the sight of the keeper of the prison.” (Genesis 39:21 NKJV)
  • “The keeper of the prison did not look into anything that was under Joseph’s authority, because the Lord was with him; and whatever he did, the Lord made it prosper.” (Genesis 39:23 NKJV)
  • “And the patriarchs, becoming envious, sold Joseph into Egypt. But God was with him and delivered him out of all his troubles, and gave him favor and wisdom in the presence of Pharaoh, king of Egypt; and he made him governor over Egypt and all his house.” (Acts 7:9-10 NKJV)

You know what these verses tell me? When we seek to honour God through our dreams, God is with us, too.

Surfing is but a picture.

Surfing is a personal dare I have yet to master, but it paints such a good picture for the obstacles we often face when going for the dreams God has placed on our hearts.

The bottom line is that we can’t give up on them, because God doesn’t give up on us. We have to keep buying the Band-Aids. One day, when we do succeed, all those falls will have been worthwhile as we feel God’s pleasure. Well done!

Question: What dream has God placed in your heart?

Credit to Kristen Hogrefe for sharing this wonderful story and experience.

Be Brave With Your Life

Life as they say is so precious. We have no right to take our life because it is too precious to harm yourself. The words of authority spoken by God in the beginning is the definition of supremacy and authority when he made man and gave him life. That is why we need to take life seriously and also enjoy it to the fullest. Be brave with your life.

By now you know my passion, my life is all about inspiring and motivating lives. A life that’s quality driven.It’s a message I intend to keep sharing for the rest of my life, because I’ve been on the other side of quantity without quality, of more pain and less pleasure, of darker days than brighter ones…Stop listening to those who say…it can’t be done, you don’t have it in you, you don’t deserve it, you are not worth it. Stop listening to that because it will kill your spirit and quench your fire. Listen to the voice of “I can, I will and I am”. Feed what you want to grow! If you want to remain in the state you are in – a life of pain, unhappiness, darkness, despair, worry, and fear then DO NOTHING!

Suicide is not an option as i have explained in the first paragraph. Your life is too precious and God sees it that way. Do your best and leave the rest.

You need to be brave with your life and take charge of it to being your better self.

Image: Pinterest

83 Ways to Become a Better Person (List 2)

Hey guys!!!

To continue with the list I started yesterday on becoming a better person. Here is 26-40. If you missed the first list, please kindly check for my previous post to read.

26. Don’t do it just because others are doing it. Such a lame excuse.
27. Break up with whoever mistreats you. And that really means whoever ! No human being should stand for that.
28. Expect nothing for one day. Just do your best.
29. Say thank you for a hundred things daily. Thank you for the air, the water, the love of my husband, the music, the internet, the sky, the sun …
30. Tip a street musician. Actually, tip every single one you ever see for the rest of your life, even if the music is mediocre.
31. Don’t tip in restaurants if the service is bad or else what’s the point of tipping for good service?
32. Be punctual. Or better yet, be 10 minutes early.
33. Pick up the bill and surprise someone.
34. Stretch your body: legs, hips, arms, shoulders, fingers and toes. Stretch and breathe.
35. Drink loose-leaf tea. Do this twice and you won’t go back to tea bags and yes this makes you a better person!
36. Help someone with a task that comes easy to you.
37. Read another dozen books by about now.
38. Start a business . This one may take longer than a day but it doesn’t take as long as it used to. Best time to start a business is today.
39. Ignore a criticism. Just let it go once and see how it feels.
40. Ditch alcohol. It’s not as cool as you think, it ruins brain cells you’ll miss later and you’ll wish you were sober so you could remember more.

Stay tuned for the next list. I think after all this, I will get a lot of testimonies and positive results.

Photo credit: Pinterest

Joyce Meyer Love Life Women’s Conference 2019

Joyce Meyer Love Life Women's Conference 2019

It’s yet another women’s conference from Joyce Meyer, as she continues to inspire women around the world through her yearly conferences. Last year was a success filled with powerful women and men of God in teaching and worship. This year will be greater and better with powerful women and men of God coming together to make this conference a memorable one.

To register for this conference click here

Also checkout highlights from last year’s conference below..

STAY BLESSED!!!