5 Tips for Conquering Negativity When Starting Your Own Business

Guest post from Katelyn Marie

Imagine this. It has been raining for so long, but you want to take a walk and meet your friend who lives a house down. The only problem is that you live on a dirt road. There are no sidewalks or paved walking paths to be found.

So, you decide to walk on the dirt road. As you take the first few steps forward the mud is so thick you can feel the suction on your shoes as they are nearly pulled off of your feet. You’re scared of the step you just took and want to turn around, but you realize that you really want to see your friend.

You push on only to slip and go sideways. You catch yourself and learn from your mistake. Pretty soon you’re walking at a good clip, but you don’t see the stick in your way and trip over it, falling down completely.

Managing to get back up, you notice you’re covered in the filth and dirt. The mud is fresh in your mouth; it tastes disgusting. You won’t be able to wash off until later, but you wipe off as much as you can.

You start to wonder when you’ll get to your friend’s house. It didn’t seem this far away before.

You think about giving up completely, but you realize that wouldn’t be wise. You’re already part way there. You’ve chosen to follow through and if you quit now, you’ll feel cheated. Besides, you want to see your friend.

Finally, you see your friend waving from her porch. She runs forward and embraces you.

“I’ve been waiting,” she says.

Revealing Your Power

  • Now, what if I told you the mud was every negative thought, naysayer, or comment that was holding you back from your dreams?
  • And your friend was success.
  • And that you were carrying a super long hose that could’ve been used to wash yourself clean at any time you chose?

Would you believe me?

When I first started out, I’m not sure I would have.

Right out of college I chose to start my own freelance writing business. That was the scariest decision I’ve made to date. It’s hard and frustrating and sometimes completely baffling. It’s all too easy to get wrapped up in the doubts and negative thinking that can accompany taking a leap of faith.

But success was calling my name. She beckoned me from her porch, called me to keep coming closer, to keep pursuing her.

It’s easy to get stuck in the mud. To fall victim to the thoughts in our own mind and voices of others who doubt our ability to achieve what we are called to. It’s easy to stumble over an obstacle in our path and let it stop us. But we must forge on.

A lot of people have called me brave for starting my own business. While these things do take courage, I think the bravest people are the ones who start working on their goals and keep working to complete them. It takes grit, determination, and bravery.

I didn’t believe it at first, but I do hold the power. And with these five ways to conquer negativity, you can hold the power, too.

Say No to Negativity When Starting Your Own Business – 5 Easy Tips

1. Not Everyone Will Understand—Don’t Expect them To

There will always be well-intentioned people who will try to change your mind. Who will try to convince you to do something safer or easier.

My advice: don’t let them. Stick to your guns and explain why your dream is important to you. If they don’t come around, they aren’t worth your time.

2. True Haters are Probably Jealous

Ever come across a person who has nothing kind to say about your business venture?

It might be their own insecurities talking. You’re doing something they’ve only dreamed about. Remind yourself that it isn’t you and if you can, distance yourself from the negativity.

3. Find Positive Places and People

Whether it’s friends and family or a group on Facebook, surround yourself with like-minded people who share your goals. It’s much easier to reign over doubt if you have people walking with you. Plus, it’s a great way to network and expand your circle of supporters.

4. Success is Measured in More than One Way

Don’t look at your business purely in terms of profit. While that’s the ultimate goal, there is so much you learn with a start-up. You’re gaining life skills that are invaluable. So, when someone tries to measure your success in monetary terms, know that’s not the only way to look at it.

5. View Mistakes as Lessons

When you start this journey and as you continue to walk on it, there will be times when you mess up. Instead of throwing in the hat and telling yourself you aren’t cut out for this, try to see mistakes as learning experiences. Work through the problem and try not to repeat it. Be as gritty as possible.

A Rocky Road is Well Worth It

It isn’t always easy to follow your dreams. Sometimes they seem impossible. We make excuses: now’s not the right time, I don’t have enough money saved, I’m too old for this, I wouldn’t know where to begin.

But the truth is we can make excuses for days. There will never be a “right” time to start. But if it is something you really want, put on your boots and stick your foot into the mud. It’ll be messy, but there’s a good chance it’ll be worth it.

Image credit: Pinterest

5 Ways to Fight Negativity & Steal Back Your Life

In recent studies, negativity is shown to form the same functional properties as addiction. Research shows these Negaholics are driven mainly by the inability to lower or release stress.

Blond man fighting negativity

Excessive stress creates a sensation of overwhelm. When people become overwhelmed it can ignite what is called the “Hole in the Soul” syndrome where people think, behave, and believe they are insufficient to meet the standard demands of life.

“A negative mind will never get you a positive life.”

As their stress escalates, these feelings of inadequacy begin to expand while their positivity begins to shrink. If you struggle with negativity, I have listed 5 ways anyone can fight off negativity and steal back their life.

5 Ways to Fight Negativity & Steal Back Your Life:

  1. Take control of your brain: Your mind is powerful. You choose positive or negative. It’s time to shift.
  2. Stop Watching the News: Today’s media is 95% negative, get away from it.
  3. Write a list of everything you’re thankful for: No matter how big or small
  4. Stop using negative words: Replace can’t with a can, won’t with a will, no with yes, tired with excited, and frustrated with understanding
  5. Have fun every day: Plan one thing per day that’s fun. Go to a restaurant, play Fifa, go to the movies, go to the gym, or take a hike. But do something you love each day. You deserve it.

Have you struggled with negativity? What has helped you fight back? Let me know in the comments below. Share

10 Practical Ways To Stop Involving Yourself With Negative Things

10 Practical ways to stop involving yourself with Negative Things

Good morning guys, trust your night and weekend was great. Welcome to a week of productivity and results.

I was going through my pad and sae this old post I initially wanted to post but probably forgot. It’s a post originally written by Brianna Weist

1. Be with people you can be honest around, or don’t be around them at all.

If you trace the beginnings of the ends of any relationships you’ve been in, I guarantee it probably had something to do with someone cutting off honesty and/or communication. (The two go hand-in-hand.)
The second you cannot say to someone “I think what you’re doing is wrong,” “I’m upset with how you’re treating me,” “I’m scared and here’s why,” “I’m having doubts and these are what they are,” or “I love you but I don’t love this thing you do,” is the second it’s going to fail.
You end up expending all of your energy pretending to be someone you’re not, and it’s not helping anybody. Only ever telling people what they want to hear verbally placates them into their same old habits, their same old ways, and nothing changes. This doesn’t mean you have to be rude. This doesn’t mean to throw effective, healthy communication out the window; there’s a difference.
If you cannot be honest with someone and have your thoughts and opinions heard, be around other people who you can. They’re out there.
If you pretend for long enough, you only end up losing yourself.

2. Stop keeping things in your life because you just don’t want to go through the stress or discomfort of letting them go.

Up to and including: friends you don’t genuinely want to spend time with, on-again-off-again flings that won’t amount to anything other than your own pain, exchanges that leave you exhausted and frustrated, resentment over things you can’t change, subscriptions to magazines that make you hate yourself, social media connections that do not add anything to your day, the phone numbers of the people you always have to text first (if at all) and love for the people who will never love you back.

3. Stop ruminating on the old and start building the new.

The second a negative thought or crippling memory crops up, don’t entertain it and allow yourself to sink further down the rabbit hole of all things could-have-been and should-have-been. Analyze what about the situation makes you uncomfortable, and figure out how you can apply what you wish you would have done to your life now. Don’t just “vow” to be different, figure out how you can actively, consciously do so. If you apply it correctly, it’s the healthiest, most effective coping mechanism around.

4. Play by the “if you’re going to forget about it in a year from now, don’t waste your energy worrying about it now” rule.

If you look back on your life, you will probably realize that you have mentally divided it into segments during which you worried compulsively about the outcome of something that either worked itself out or wouldn’t matter in a relatively short period of time.
Simply: if you look back, you’ll realize that no feeling was ever final, and you wasted your time concerning yourself with issues that weren’t either.
It’ll give you the perspective to work cultivating that mindset now, before you’re looking back on these years and thinking the same things.

5. Don’t allow your “no” to be the beginning of a negotiation.

You get as much respect as you demand. You teach people how to treat you. If you don’t feel that your wants or needs are being understood or respected, find a way to communicate them better, and then learn what it means for you to draw lines — even if that’s as serious as completely walking away. It’s not a matter of giving up easily, it’s a matter of knowing what you’re not going to permit.

6. There’s not one person on this planet that’s like, “yeah, this is exactly how I thought it would go.” Stop projecting a future based on what you believe in now.

The unknown is scary. So scary, in fact, that we decide things about our futures based on what we can conceive of being possible now, and the fault in this is that we get attached to an outcome that isn’t necessarily most right for us.
We tend to be surprised by what we get in place of what we thought we wanted. Even the concept of relinquishing future control just comes across as another elusive platitude, but it’s really, really important. It’s the only way to free yourself from impending suffering.

7. Learn what it means to view everything objectively, in light of what it will ultimately amount to in the bigger picture.

This whole world isn’t indebted to you, but nor is it out to get you. People aren’t usually “against” things, they’re just for themselves. People think of you far less than you worry about them doing so. Your perspective is just one of them. You are a speck in the span of infinity. Remember how small you are.

8. Don’t expect to receive that which you don’t communicate you want.

You get what you have the courage to ask for.

9. Don’t let one thing define you.

There is not one decision or day or instance that makes you who you are. You are what you repeatedly do. The only thing that isn’t normal is to pretend that you never struggle, have never suffered, never feel anything but happiness, etc. You’re supposed to ebb and flow, you shouldn’t want it any other way. It means you’re alive, you’re invested in things that matter, you made mistakes but you made an effort regardless, and you’re not emotionally or otherwise stunted, as would be the case if you didn’t feel remorse or sadness or grief.

10. Realize that the problem is always you.

Now that sounds harsh, and I imagine a slew of you will want to rise and disagree, and I get that, but to be really honest with you, that’s the problem.

Here’s the thing: you are the only thing you can control. If you are upset with a situation, you cannot force people into changing to suit your wants and needs, so you have to change what you can control: whether or not you’re removing yourself from it, asserting yourself, or changing your mindset about how you’re going to approach it.

If you aren’t doing so — the problem is you.

Feel free to share and repost on your platform. Also don’t forget to drop your comments.

Stop Blaming Others

Make it an every-day lullaby and refuse to blame anyone for anything – past, present or future. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. “

From this point forward, refuse to make excuses or to justify your behaviours. If you make a mistake, say, “I’m sorry, ” and get busy rectifying the situation. Everytime you blame someone else or make excuses, you give your power away. You feel weakened and diminished. You feel negative and angry inside. Refuse to do it.

Take charge of your life!!!

The Skill Of Not Reacting to Negative People – in 3 Simple Steps

Every day we wake up ready to go into the world, looking to experience our optimal type of day.

We want peace and happiness. We want productivity and success. We want rewards and fulfillment.

And we plan as best we can to create that type of day we want.

We can create the right mindset and energy before stepping into the world.

We can take focused action toward the results we want.

We can choose where to go, who to be with and what to do.

These are all things we can control.

But, there’s something we can’t control, and it can have a major impact on ALL the things we want to achieve and experience.

That something is OTHER PEOPLE!

Dealing with the Negativity of Others

We quickly learn in life that no matter how zen we choose to be, other people might cross our path and bring their negative energy into our zone.

We also very quickly learn that if we get upset about their negativity, if we buy into it, if we judge them, if we resist and say it “shouldn’t be this way” … then we end up suffering and in negativity with them!

So one of the best things we can learn on our personal growth journey is the ART OF NOT REACTING TO NEGATIVITY.

It’s an art form because it takes practice, and grace.

Our human nature tends to be that we drop down into negativity unless we consciously choose to keep ourselves up above it.

When someone brings their negative energy your way, here are the 2 important things to remember:

  1. It’s like fishing. They throw out the fishing line with negativity bait on a hook. Will you be the fish who isn’t aware and bites, taking the bait and ending up in a tug of war? Or will you be the wise fish who sees the bait and keeps on swimming past it?
  2. If you give your energy to negativity and negative people, you’re flushing it down the toilet. Your energy is so precious, and each day you only have a certain amount of that energy to give to the world. So you have to be super smart about what and who you give your precious energy to. If you give it to negativity, you can’t give it to your goals and dreams!

So, in order for us to experience the type of peaceful, happy, productive and successful day we want, we have to learn the art of not reacting to negativity if it crosses our path.

We get prepared in advanced, so we can masterfully deflect it.

The Art of Not Reacting to Negative People – 3 Simple Steps

Here’s a 3 step process to help you practice non-reaction…

1. See it Coming

You know what negativity looks and sounds like. So be present and aware for when it crosses your path. If you see it coming (like a baited hook dangling in the water!), you have a chance to stand back and breathe before biting! You can instead make a conscious choice not to engage with that negativity.

2. It’s Not About You

Always remind yourself that other people’s negativity is not about you. It’s a reflection of something that is going on inside their mind and emotional system, and it’s being projected around you or toward you.

Too often we get tangled up in other people’s negativity because our egos take it personally and react to their behavior or words. Rather – keep accurate perspective that someone who is being negative is just a fellow human being going through pain. It’s not about you.

3. Wish them Peace & Happiness

The quickest way to non-reaction and inner peace when you’re witnessing someone being negative around you or toward you, is to wish them peace and happiness.

This doesn’t mean saying out loud to their face, “I wish you peace and happiness”.

It’s a mantra you say inside yourself.

This is a practice of conscious and spirited living to say within your own mind and heart, “I wish them peace and happiness. I wish them peace and happiness. I wish them peace and happiness…”

I know you don’t want anyone on this planet to suffer, not you or any other person who crosses your path. And using this mantra helps you to sit in the energy of forgiveness, compassion and detachment.

Inspired by: Bernadette Logue

Life Coach